fake

253 items found

788611792816488448

donotdestroy:

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are.”

– Kurt Cobain

788521044126351360

donotdestroy:

“The difference between bullshit and lying is that bullshit is constructed without any concern for the truth. It’s designed to impress rather than inform. And then lying, of course, is very concerned with the truth — but subverting it.”

788102879070273536

donotdestroy:

By being treated in these damaging ways, the child learns that being yourself is dangerous, that in order to survive and be at least marginally accepted by your caregivers, you have to hide who you really are: your thoughts, observations, feelings, and preferences.

Other times the child decides to lie to get their needs met, needs that otherwise would be completely ignored. For example, if the caregivers are emotionally distant, the child might lie or pretend that somethings going on just to receive some attention.

And, of course, if the child is routinely attacked or rejected for being authentic, they learn to hide and pretend. In many cases, to the degree where they gradually lose connection to their authentic self and have no idea anymore who they really are.

This is tragic. However, its important to realize that, as adults, we don’t have to be afraid of abandonment anymore. We don’t need our caregivers to survive. We can endure and deal with all these feelings of betrayal, hurt, distrust, shame, loneliness, anger, and many others.

As adults we can slowly untangle all of these problems and slowly rediscover who we really are. We also can start working on trusting others who actually are trustworthy. We can become authentic again.

787294150285459456

Top five regrets of the dying

donotdestroy:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

787020987599306752

donotdestroy:

“Perhaps the most critical piece of evidence for the theory of hypocrisy as false signaling is that people disliked hypocrites more than so-called ‘honest hypocrites.’ In a fourth online study, the researchers tested perceptions of ‘honest hypocrites,’ who — like traditional hypocrites — condemn behaviors that they engage in, but who also admit that they sometimes commit those behaviors. ‘The extent to which people forgive honest hypocrites was striking to us,’ says Jordan. ‘These honest hypocrites are seen as no worse than people who commit the same transgressions but keep their mouths shut and refrain from judging others for doing the same — suggesting that the entirety of our dislike for hypocrites can be attributed to the fact that they falsely signal their virtue.’”

786532319115853824

donotdestroy:

“Genuine individuals require no validation, while pretenders feel compelled to prove themselves.”

— Do Not Destroy

786362817179795456

donotdestroy:

“You can’t copy anybody and end with anything. If you copy, it means you’re working without any real feeling.”

— Milt Jackson

786252773943574528

donotdestroy:

“The difference between bullshit and lying is that bullshit is constructed without any concern for the truth. It’s designed to impress rather than inform. And then lying, of course, is very concerned with the truth — but subverting it.”

785450726624231424

donotdestroy:

“Genuine individuals require no validation, while pretenders feel compelled to prove themselves.”

— Do Not Destroy

785103427141320704

donotdestroy:

“You can’t copy anybody and end with anything. If you copy, it means you’re working without any real feeling.”

— Milt Jackson

784442671045525504

donotdestroy:

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are.”

– Kurt Cobain

784013296490741760

donotdestroy:

“The difference between bullshit and lying is that bullshit is constructed without any concern for the truth. It’s designed to impress rather than inform. And then lying, of course, is very concerned with the truth — but subverting it.”

783661450058186752

donotdestroy:

By being treated in these damaging ways, the child learns that being yourself is dangerous, that in order to survive and be at least marginally accepted by your caregivers, you have to hide who you really are: your thoughts, observations, feelings, and preferences.

Other times the child decides to lie to get their needs met, needs that otherwise would be completely ignored. For example, if the caregivers are emotionally distant, the child might lie or pretend that somethings going on just to receive some attention.

And, of course, if the child is routinely attacked or rejected for being authentic, they learn to hide and pretend. In many cases, to the degree where they gradually lose connection to their authentic self and have no idea anymore who they really are.

This is tragic. However, its important to realize that, as adults, we don’t have to be afraid of abandonment anymore. We don’t need our caregivers to survive. We can endure and deal with all these feelings of betrayal, hurt, distrust, shame, loneliness, anger, and many others.

As adults we can slowly untangle all of these problems and slowly rediscover who we really are. We also can start working on trusting others who actually are trustworthy. We can become authentic again.

782947061478916096

donotdestroy:

We lie to ourselves to protect our self-images, which allows us to act immorally while maintaining a clear conscience. According to the very latest research, self-deception may have even evolved to help us to persuade others; if we start believing our own lies, it’s much easier to get other people to believe them, too.

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