hate

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“Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.” — Martin Luther King Jr.

Jack Lewis Hiller
Martin Luther King Jr.
1960
gelatin silver print

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“Thailand’s former prime minister Thaksin Shinawatra has come under heavy criticism for delivering a racially tinged speech at a political rally where he allegedly said the country’s women struggle to become supermodels despite looking better than Africans.”

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donotdestroy:

“Insecure people put others down to raise themselves up.”

— Habeeb Akande

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“Hatred has to be learned, Golden says: ‘We are all born with the capacity for aggression as well as compassion. Which tendencies we embrace requires mindful choice by individuals, families, communities and our culture in general. The key to overcoming hate is education: at home, in schools, and in the community.’ According to Dutchevici, facing the fear of being vulnerable and utterly human is what allows us to connect, to feel, and ultimately, to love. She suggests creating ‘cracks in the system.’ These cracks can be as simple as connecting to your neighbor, talking with a friend, starting a protest, or even going to therapy and connecting with an ‘Other.’ It is through these acts that one can understand hate and love.”

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donotdestroy:

“In order to understand what happens in your body when you dislike someone, you can start by trying to understand fear. As Robert Sapolsky writes in “Why Your Brain Hates Other People,” when we see someone who even looks different from us, “there is preferential activation of the amygdala,” which means the brain region associated with fear and aggression flares up. This visceral, emotional reaction can spark a long-term pattern of dislike when it’s validated by action: if you perceive that someone has hurt you, your fear of them becomes rational. Our negative feelings toward someone get stronger as bad experiences with them pile up, and these negative thoughts trigger the fight-or-flight response in our bodies.”

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“I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.”

— Booker T. Washington

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“Hate can breed more negative emotions. It can affect personal and professional relationships. Hatred changes the chemistry in the brain. It stimulates the area in the brain responsible for planning and execution of motion. This part triggers aggression while feeling hateful to either defend or attack. This also creates ‘fight or flight’ responses and increases the levels of two hormones: cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones can cause weight gain, insomnia, anxiety, depression, and chronic illness. Hatred also triggers the mind to try to predict what the person being hated may do as a defense mechanism. This leads to further anxiety, restlessness, obsessive thinking, and paranoia, which affects overall mental health.”

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“If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us.”

— Hermann Hesse

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“Like anybody, I like clothes, and I enjoy what I like to wear. We might have a difference in personal outfit choices. Some might not like it. But to judge someone because of their appearance is pretty foolish. If you have time to do that, I suggest you look at yourself in the mirror and spend more time developing yourself. Come on, it’s 2013.”

— G-Dragon

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The Thai Character: Flexibility and Adjustment Orientation

donotdestroy:

Flexibility and Corruption

Since the Thai are not principle oriented, and with
the high value for personal relationships, they also appear not to be
strictly law-oriented. In practice, principles and laws are
ever-adjustable to fit persons and situations. In other words, laws are
rules laid out in papers; but what is wrong or right depends not on the
rules, but instead on who the person is or whom the person knows. A
prominent Thai businessman ironically described this phenomenon in a
seminar:

We Thai are not a society of law; we are a society
of relationship…. It is not what a person has done that’s wrong; it’s
who he is…. If he is your cousin, or your friend, then what he has
done is not wrong. But if another person does the same thing, and it’s
somebody you don’t like, then what he has done is wrong…
   
This is the reason why law enforcement in Thailand hardly works. If
it does, it is selectively enforced on those who are either nobody or do
not know anybody, or who have no money to ease their wrong-doings or
buy their way out of problems. As a society of relationship, it is easy
and common for an officer, upon request from even friends of friends, to
pull out, cross out or destroy a traffic citation issued. For the sake
of a smooth relationship, officers would overlook, turn a blind eye, or
keep silent. The point here is that, while the basic Thai value system
should not be blamed as the major factor for corruption, it definitely
does not help to inhibit corruption either.
   

In general, this characteristic “Flexibility and
Adjustment” value orientation has perhaps accounted for varieties of
behavioral patterns, ranging from the facilitation of ethnic
assimilation process, to the tendency of being corruption prone. In
addition, it provides a deeper understanding to the various existing
interpretations of the Thai being “unpredictable”, “non-committing”,
“irresponsible” or even “selfish” and “opportunistic”, by foreigners.
   

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Why do people bully?

There are different reasons why people bully, including:

  • wanting to dominate others and improve their social status
  • having low self-esteem and wanting to feel better about themselves
  • having a lack of remorse or failing to recognise their behaviour as a problem
  • feeling angry, frustrated or jealous
  • struggling socially
  • being the victim of bullying themselves

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