low self worth

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Why do people bully?

There are different reasons why people bully, including:

  • wanting to dominate others and improve their social status
  • having low self-esteem and wanting to feel better about themselves
  • having a lack of remorse or failing to recognise their behaviour as a problem
  • feeling angry, frustrated or jealous
  • struggling socially
  • being the victim of bullying themselves

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“[The bullshitter] does not reject the authority of the truth, as the liar does, and oppose himself to it. He pays no attention to it at all. By virtue of this, bullshit is a greater enemy of the truth than lies are.”

— Harry Frankfurt (On Bullshit, p. 61)

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“It is impossible for someone to lie unless he thinks he knows the truth. Producing bullshit requires no such conviction. A person who lies is thereby responding to the truth, and he is to that extent respectful of it. When an honest man speaks, he says only what he believes to be true; and for the liar, it is correspondingly indispensable that he considers his statements to be false. For the bullshitter, however, all these bets are off: he is neither on the side of the true nor on the side of the false. His eye is not on the facts at all, as the eyes of the honest man and of the liar are, except insofar as they may pertain to his interest in getting away with what he says. He does not care whether the things he says describe reality correctly. He just picks them out, or makes them up, to suit his purpose.”

— Harry Frankfurt (On Bullshit, pp. 55-56)

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“Money worship is a type of money disorder. The core driver of this behaviour is the belief that having more money will lead to greater happiness in the afterlife.”

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“We all lie to ourselves. Whether we’re convincing ourselves that something is or isn’t true, self-deception is a common psychological tactic—so common, in fact, that people can be unaware they’re even doing it.

But why do we do it? Research defines self-deception as an independent mental state made up of conscious and unconscious memories and attitudes, as well as controlled and automatic processes, that serves as an attempt at self-protection or enhancement.”

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“Leon Festinger (1957) proposed cognitive dissonance theory, which states that a powerful motive to maintain cognitive consistency can give rise to irrational and sometimes maladaptive behavior.

Festinger’s (1957) cognitive dissonance theory suggests that we have an inner drive to hold all our attitudes and beliefs in harmony and avoid disharmony (or dissonance).

Resolving cognitive dissonance

1) We can change our attitude

2) We can acquire new information

3) We can reduce the importance of our beliefs

The more a person wishes to conform, the more likely they are to use cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance explains many of our everyday actions. The person who steals from his employer but tells himself that he is underpaid and deserves the extra is twisting the interpretation of his behavior in order to still feel he is okay as a human being is another good example.”

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