Mark Twain

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“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.”

― Mark Twain

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“A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”

― Mark Twain

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Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

— Mark Twain 

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Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

— Mark Twain

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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

— Mark Twain

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Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

— Mark Twain

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“Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to
dispute. Indeed, my experiments have proven to me that he is the
Unreasoning Animal… In truth, man is incurably foolish. Simple things
which other animals easily learn, he is incapable of learning. Among my
experiments was this. In an hour I taught a cat and a dog to be friends.
I put them in a cage. In another hour I taught them to be friends with a
rabbit. In the course of two days I was able to add a fox, a goose, a
squirrel and some doves. Finally a monkey. They lived together in peace;
even affectionately.

Next, in another cage I confined an Irish
Catholic from Tipperary, and as soon as he seemed tame I added a Scotch
Presbyterian from Aberdeen. Next a Turk from Constantinople; a Greek
Christian from Crete; an Armenian; a Methodist from the wilds of
Arkansas; a Buddhist from China; a Brahman from Benares. Finally, a
Salvation Army Colonel from Wapping. Then I stayed away for two whole
days. When I came back to note results, the cage of Higher Animals was
all right, but in the other there was but a chaos of gory odds and ends
of turbans and fezzes and plaids and bones and flesh–not a specimen
left alive. These Reasoning Animals had disagreed on a theological
detail and carried the matter to a Higher Court.”
 
 ― Mark Twain